Why

Freedom.

The power.

For power,

the war.

From war,

the death.

The death,

for freedom.

To Carol

As I walk tonight,

I look to the stars,

and they are as far away,

as you were once from me.

And the love in my heart reach's out and holds the star.

And from the star comes my life.

And my life is full,

and I want for no more.

I see a love,

a beauty,

and a life.

And I find I want to be with her.

But I dare not to reach out,

for I fear I will hurt her with my touch.

And as I am in despair,

the love and beauty touches my heart.

and the love becomes my life,

and our love become the beauty,

and we will live forever,

And not die.

For in love and beauty,

is life.

As I walk in the garden,

and feel the colors,

and see the perfumes,

I feel as an ant in the workshop of an artist.

The Door

I want to go in,

but I cannot open the door.

within is the warm I need.

Yet,

the handle is hard to turn,

and my strength lies in the rust of time.

I cry out for someone to help me.

And as the people come and go from the door,

they look at me,

and continue on.

And time passes with them.

And I cry out in vain,

I live without hope of going in the door,

I cannot open.

I go in hope,

but men will not help.

as I try to see,

they give no light.

And if I open my heart to feel,

I find that in love is pain.

The pain in which I live,

after the love is gone.

The Fireplace

Look at the ashes,

do they look cold and dead?

Yet,

if you blow on them,

you will see they are alive and will warm you.

Now look in to my heart,

does it seem cold and dead?

Yet,

like the ashes,

but with a few words,

you can find the warmth in it.

A Idea

To contemplate,

to run with it through the hills and valleys of your mind.

living with it,

to love it as your own.

Looking to find the good in it.

And,

if you find you agree,

or not.

Yet to do so,

with love.

It is his mind,

and his life,

his thoughts.

And they are shaped by his dreams.

I can tell him my thoughts and beliefs.

It is for him to find the truth,

And false,

in them.

To entwine the truth into his life,

and use the false,

to find truth.

Genesis:2-18

"And the Lord God said, it is not good that the man should be

alone; I will make him an help meet for him".

And the Lord God did,

but for me there is not found a help meet,

and it is not good.

For I am sorrowful and cry for myself.

By the days and by the nights I dream for one.

And I hope.

And in my days I wander,

my heart finds no one.

Yet my heart still looks to the Lord God,

and I have hope.

I know not of life,

for my life is as a dream.

And my dreams are as my reality.

And my reality is that of a greater man.

A man who cannot be,

who exists not,

But in my dreams.

Process

To go within that which is.

As the ticks of a clock man's thoughts of that which he would

have go.

To move faster,

and climb higher in the world where he is.

To take what he sees and to show it to the world,

with out to move or hurt it.

To talk to the one he loves,

when she is so far away,

That he could never see her.

To see a light in the nights sky,

and from his world,

to reach it.

I am as one with time.

We flow without touching the things that would delay us.

For there are many along our way that bid us to stop.

To hear a sound,

or to look upon that which they would have us see.

And to stop is to find joy and happiness,

and to be content.

But there is opposition in all things.

For joy and happiness,

there must be sorrow and despair.

And in being content,

we will become buried in our ways and lost to the world.

And we content on.

To Say Farewell

It is hard to say farewell,

to one so young and fair.

To think that we will not meet again.

And that I will not know you,

and that you will not know me.

I will think of you often,

I hope you will think of me.

Farewell.

I will not say of your beauty.

I cannot give you the stars,

or even say the sun will shine.

And to say,

all our days will be happy,

I would be a fool.

But,

If of these you do not care,

take my hand,

and come with me.

And I will show you all that I see,

tell you all I feel,

and give you my heart.

And all I have will be yours.

Oh of all the years I've sought thee.

The many places I've looked,

and the people I've known.

Of the joy when I thought I had found thee.

And yet too,

pain then I knew it was not.

This is but memories now,

for I have found thee.

And the future is ours,

for we are in love.

I sit alone,

eating candy,

thinking of my loves.

How one laughed,

and one watched me.

Of walks in fields,

hand in hand,

making plans.

Of being together,

happy and gay.

Of the look in her eyes,

the sound of her voice.

And of all we did,

memories help.

To lose love,

is to lose all,

but hope.

I am one,

alone.

You are one,

together.

Venus

Standing in her lonely corner,

looking out with her large,

sad eyes.

She's alone and so am I.

I watch wanting to go to her,

and with my touch to bring her joy.

And I,

in her joy to find joy.

There she stands,

my sad venus.

Venus,

I want to love thee.

Yet in my heart is fear.

Your alone and so am I.

Do not curse the mountain that lays in your way,

but marvel at it strength,

and at it's magnificent.

Then climb to the top,

and look down upon it.

Now are you not greater than it?

So it is with life,

there will be many problems in your way.

And some will seem as impassable as a mountain.

Yet,

a problem is just to be solved,

as a mountain is to be climbed.

And the greater it is,

the greater you will be when it is done.

To be seen in darkness,

one must be in the light.

To see into darkness,

one must give light.

To leave the darkness,

one must fallow the light.

Finding not

Love is winging,

swiftly before me.

Going on,

with the sun.

Running after,

hopeful running.

Finding not,

finding not.

Here is beauty,

long sought after.

There is beauty,

fairer still.

Where's the beauty,

I run after.

Finding not,

finding not.

White seem gray,

gray seem black.

Are black and write,

yet the same.

Where is the truth,

I run after.

Finding not,

finding not.

I want to live,

not sitting still.

But free as a sail,

going where I will.

This is the life,

I run after.

Finding not,

finding not.

In secret ways I move.

To raise grain on grain,

building slowly,

carefully,

that all my secrets will be good.

And I hide it from all.

Until by it's greatness,

no one may kick it down.

Till all grains are lost within it,

as atoms are,

within grains.

That all are truly one.

till within,

I it's maker,

will fear no more.

A beauty in my mind,

like a lover's sweet song.

A feeling of love in my heart,

all who meet her must feel.

A longing to be with her,

that cannot be denied.

A sparkling joy and warmth,

only in her eyes.

To be with her,

is joy unknown.

To hold her,

without time.

For her,

I would die.

For she is all,

I am nothing.

Tis my joy to bring joy.

And it is my love to help you to find love.

And it is my life to bring joy and love to all.

And when I find I cannot give these to you,

it tears my heart,

and bring my tears to flow.

For I have known life without joy and love,

and my life was no better than death!

Tis my joy to bring joy.

As a bird barred from the heavens by a cage,

longing to soar the sky.

Rising with the warm air,

to high above the earth.

To go with little effort,

far across the land.

To be like a ship of sail,

flying over the seas,

To where I wish to go.

And like a tree of fruit,

to stand free of all,

except land and rain.

Yet,

to give freely to all.

I want to fly far to night's stars,

seeing all that awaits me there.

To be free of daily cares.

To lose no more time,

sold that I may buy freedom.

The sort of freedom short lived,

and soon lost to me.

I want to find joy,

not brought of man.

Of friends of life,

and not just parties.

I want to be free.

After the rain has stopped.

And the sun comes to it's throne.

Leaves,

in golden glory of autumn,

carried forth upon the wind.

Going in to all the world,

and here to land,

and show their beauty to us,

from so far away,

Can you not see God?

Some where,

she waits,

very far,

from me.

Though time,

and space,

between is,

my heart,

and hers.

Some where,

she waits.

I wander,

from here,

to where.

With time,

though space.

Looking for,

her arms,

about me.

For ever,

to hold,

her close,

to me.

Some time,

we'll meet.

Some where,

find love.

Some day,

together be.

Though time,

and space,

between is.

Some where,

some time,

she waits,

for me.

I'm sorry grass,

I know you're like glass,

so fragile on to pass,

today.

But I had to pass,

across you grass,

to get the glass,

today.

I need that glass,

that lays on you grass,

I need that glass,

today.

I need that glass,

for my giraffe,

that's on you grass,

today.

Grass my giraffe's glass,

is on you grass,

so on you I pass,

today.

If they say ill of me ?

Then we'll let our tears be,

the drops of dew falling from the leaves,

before the morning sun.

And the wind howling in the night our cries.

And in the new day,

with actions true,

going beyond their words.

Showing the good of our beings.

That none but fools,

and the deceived,

will believe the dark words.

The fools we cannot help,

so we will cry for them.

And those deceived,

to help to the sun's light.

So that all the dark,

will lose their hiding,

and be seen false.

And chains of darkness,

will no longer hold captive,

those who heard dark words,

yet looked not to see the acts.

And in this we'll be known.

Once I stood alone,

with dark clouds around me.

Once I couldn't see,

the bright hope of today.

Once I bore the dark world,

crushing on my shoulders.

Once when I needed your help,

I would manly turn away.

Once proudly I needed no one.

No friendly hand could help me.

Once I vainly needed no one,

now no one needs me.

Morning Symphony

Before the sun's ascension in golden glory.

Before birds sing in the morn.

The sky's smooth,

soft,

breath breathe across the land.

And like a babe's first breath,

brings life anew.

Leaves rustle eagerly and majestic oaks dance with

impatience.

Quickly the dance begins among the tall slender grasses.

And flowers turn their brightly color faces to see.

Now the cheerful birds begin the song of the new day.

First one,

then another,

building a crescendo,

till now with all singing it becomes a grand symphony.

Unmatched by man's greatness.

And now,

the fantastic festival,

with gay,

bright colors,

is lost.

Slowly the grand music dies away.

The dancers slowly stop.

Slowly the morn's breath ends.

In awe,

of the sun.

On noble wings,

they fly the sky,

far above the land.

Going where,

some men but dream,

of going to one day.

To where some will look,

and yet others will turn away.

For there's but great and noble things,

that live up in the sky.

And man is born of earthly soil,

and in the soil will work.

For the sky is but a useless thing,

and they turn away.

Yet some will look and think,

and though,

upon the soil they must climb,

if in the sky to be.

For the sky they will reach.

And in the sky,

be.

High upon the Oak,

on one of the many limbs,

a single leaf wait's.

Trembling in the wind,

till it can be free,

to go with the wind,

the gusts carrying,

in joyful flight.

Till landing in a brook,

with its cheerful sounds.

To be like many others like unto it.

Swirling in the current,

with another in an eddy,

once,

and when,

to stay on a stone,

or perhaps the shore.

Then to go again,

upon the water.

Then in the end to rest,

to go no more.

I touch you,

you touch me,

the world touch's,

you and me.

I am part,

and you another,

all just parts.

One part nothing,

not touching another.

Part together become,

whole and one.

you,

one.

I am.

I know my thoughts,

I let them run free.

I walk my paths.

I live in my ways,

I let others in their way be.

I know my goals,

I work to their day.

I fly on the wings of my dreams,

I run and leap,

climbing upwards to my stars.

I am me.

I am a man.

Through another eyes I look,

at that which I cannot see.

Of people,

places and great events,

that are not a part of me.

'fore my clouded eyes do not see,

some things that clearly be.

An then again what may not be,

some one else will clearly see.

And with their eyes I can go,

To places far and wide.

With the world open to me.

And all there is to see.

And though my eyes are blind to see.

Through their eyes all I may know.

I dream of someone,

with who to find love.

I look for someone,

with beauty within my eyes.

One who's joy is found,

just where I find mine.

Someone who waits to see me,

and is happy then she does.

One who does what she wishes,

and lets me do the same.

Someone's who's dreams,

are found in my dreams.

Someone who sees me,

and knows just who I am.

Someone who'll walk beside me.

Someone I can love.

We want to reach you.

Yes,

your just the one.

But not in your blue jeans,

wear a coat and a tie.

Yes,

we do want you,

please come and be gay.

And we all must look nice,

so no one will question our way,

or think we are wrong,

for dressing your way.

Please won't you come,

we'll have a good time.

Just don't wear those clothes,

and act in your way.

Now why do you turn,

and now,

walk away.

We want to reach the one.

Yes,

you are the one.

But we do care about you,

and your clothes are wrong.

But your just the one.

Onward it comes,

with many ware's.

To sell to me,

for a price so low,

I could not say no,

to these,

from many.

To look anew,

upon the world.

To have again strength,

that now is gone.

And to know my dreams.

These it will sell me.

And for a price so very low,

surely I'll not say no.

And yet,

still more.

Before my eyes,

it's wares I can see.

A free,

clean mind,

with all dust blown out.

And to do with ease,

that which other men but dream.

All this,

much more,

and still for a price so low.

All it's asks,

is but for a third,

of all my life to give.

Yes,

but a third,

is all to pay,

the price sleep asks,

of me.

I am there

I open my eyes.

And though them

I see the sky.

And like leaves,

blown by the wind,

to patterns know but to God.

Stars

lining the deep velvets of heaven.

The dream of them calls me.

And I rise up.

And go out from the world.

Fleeing from the tenuous hold.

Going too,

past her moon,

without a lost of pace.

Leaving too,

her sun's planets far below.

With swift flight to go,

deep within man's dreams.

For dreams are what my life will be.

And in dreams I'll always be.

So I will rise out to the dreams,

and again of the world,

I can never be.

You ask me,

who I am.

I am the third,

all three one,

yet still,

each a life apart.

In to two,

I was born,

in to the first,

without beginning,

as in the last,

yet to come,

without end.

And to know who I am,

you must know of each.

when in the first,

I was not in this body of matter,

nor of any known to man.

I was without time.

And times beyond number,

I watched this universe's beginnings.

Exploding out of out that great fire ball,

flinging galaxies like dust.

And in them,

stars without count.

So that worlds beyond numbering,

laid before me to see and know.

and stars to give the heavens beauty.

I saw the stars live,

and too,

die.

And like a phoenix,

rise up from their ashes,

born again,

yet again to die.

And then,

though full,

the sky is dark and without life.

And then as always before,

they fall collapsing on them selves,

falling all within the great ball again.

And then for a time to begin anew.

And once,

as I looked among the galaxies,

in one of them,

at it's heart,

was a being unlike myself.

And around him many beings like unto me.

And there I,

for the first time,

was born.

Into a body yet not of matter,

a form of a man,

yet still without time.

And then begun,

My great quest.

and too others,

to fallow the being,

who we then,

as now,

called Father.

And we with him planned our quest.

A bold quest with danger.

Then,

one by one,

leaving to join the quest,

by being born again.

In to this body.

And the being you know.

Ant although I remember not of my life's before this.

Yet,

some of what I was before,

I know now.

And too,

I know that which my quest is.

And I am,

and will,

working and fighting,

for it to be.

For it is,

and will be my fourth life,

and the greatest of all.

When in it,

I will have all of the best of myself.

And then will be a beginning which can only be know,

as God.

And now you may truly see,

that which I am.

That which I was.

That which I hope to be.

And now,

knowing these things,

you may know your answer of,

who I am.

He looks to his lord,

and he says he sins,

and he knows why it's wrong,

and he says he'll stop.

He's just a fool.

He tries not to think of it.

He tries to do the right.

And he tries to be good.

He's just a fool.

He thinks he'll weaken.

And he thinks it will be hard.

And he thinks he will fail.

He's just a fool.

Not because he says he will,

not because he say's he sins,

and not because he tries to stop.

He's just a fool.

Because he tries not to think of it,

and he can't win by running away.

Because he thinks he'll weaken,

and he must believe he can.

And because he thinks he'll fail,

he will.

He's just a fool.

Smile at me,

so I'll know you're happy.

Talk with me,

I don't want to be a bore.

Walk beside me,

so I'll know you want to be here.

Look in my eyes,

so I'll know its true.

I want you happy,

and I don't want to bore you.

And I really am lonely,

And I want you,

to want to be here.

In your eyes I can see if you do.

I'm so very lonely,

and I'm so much afraid.

I need someone to be with me.

I don't want to be alone again.

I am with great sorrow.

And I cry within my heart.

For in my life there has been great lost.

For my love that knew no bounds,

went from my life,

and left me lifeless.

I've knew dreams of greatness.

To take long labor to from.

Torn down from the sky,

and cast to the earth,

to be ground under foot.

I have lived with my soul in darkness,

I went alone cast out of the light.

And many things more,

which cast long shadows,

and endless pain within me.

And at some times,

as indeed now,

I know only that which was dark in life.

Thinking light will never be again.

And the good I have know,

is liken to dreams in the night,

Which in the dawn is never coming.

The dawn I now await.

They see me in darkness,

because they do not look.

They think I am different,

because they do not feel.

Within the ways they live.

And but little look to others.

Thinking not,

but with fear of doing thinks not the same.

And because of this,

they look to find evil in them.

And find evil and always will.

And not see the greater good.

In myself they find evil.

And in gathering evil in themselves,

and seeing not the evil in themselves,

will in evil always be.

Light can be brought to darkness,

mud can be washed away.

That which is done in error,

helps that the error will not be done again.

That which is lowered,

we can rise again.

That which we destroy,

we can make greater.

And that which we do,

we can always do better.

If we fail,

we can try again.

If there be evil,

there is good also.

What ever we feel,

it is we who feel it.

However high we dream,

there we something higher to be dreamed.

And where ever we are,

we have stopped there.

Where ever we go,

we must go there.

What fools we are within our walls,

that we have built to keep others out,

with many stones cut with care to fit.

Stones of fear, hate and greed.

Stones of envy and much, much more.

And to fill the cracks,

though they be so small,

lies a plenty.

And upon their tops,

To be their crown.

A crown of thorns with many barbs,

of distrust and unyielding in our ways.

These are but a few of which we build.

Some walls are thin,

many are wide.

And very few,

all too very few are thin and hard to see.

May ours be one of the very,

very few.

And but small fools we be.

Once I had a dream.

A dream of wanting to have.

Many years I dreamed.

Till one day I need dream no more.

And that day my dream died.

And became a millstone about my neck.

For I dreamed of the earth,

and to the earth was tied.

Gone was my freedom,

No longer to walk my path.

No longer to be free.

Now a true dream have I.

A dream of freedom,

to walk where I would,

doing only that which I would.

Of being me.

And all this can be.

Now I dream again,

but now,

of being free.